There’s no justice.
If you’re a plant, and you’re tall, slim, and leggy, you’re a failure. If you’re a human, and you’re tall, slim, and leggy, you’re Gisele Bundchen. So, while I’ll keep the frontal lobe, free will, and opposable thumbs that are the perquisites of my species, I’d love to arrange a physique trade with my broccoli rabe seedlings.
They’d be so much better off if they had my – ahem – sturdy bottom half. And if I had their legs, I could quit this whole writing thing and make a living modeling knee braces, or maybe socks.
Why are my seedlings so leggy? They’re in standard-issue seed starter, growing in a warm room with lots of natural light. But each and every one them is two little tiny leaves perched precariously atop several inches of reedy stem. Where did I go wrong?